Garden of Eden

Your Orgasmic self


Orgasm is one of the most intense and satisfying human experiences a man and women can have. 
All orgasms, however, are not created equal. Orgasms are slightly different for each person, and even different for the same person at different times. 
Orgasms by men and women share certain characteristics, including rhythmic body movements, increased heart rate, muscle tension, and then a sudden release of tension, including pelvic contractions, and auditory sound from our mouths.
With men and women it includes "involuntary rhythmic contractions" of the anal sphincter, increased breathing rate, increased heart rate, and elevation of blood pressure; and of course intense pleasure.

We touched on orgasms in another article. Now we are going to discuss it in a little more detail.
Women need to know their own bodies, you need to know more about your vulva, your clitoris, your own personal G spots.
When you Orgasm. All the sphincters of her pelvic diaphragm (the “Kegel” muscle) contract in unison—urethra, vagina, and anus.
The clitoris is Grand Central Station for erotic sensation. The dominance of the clitoris in women’s orgasms explains why 80–90 percent of women who masturbate typically do so with little or no vaginal penetration, including when they use vibrators.
There’s this old saying: “It ain’t the size of the boat, it’s the motion of the ocean.”
For some women it absolutely both; guilty. 
Well we are allowed to be a little selfish sometimes, a guilty pleasure. 
I am lucky because my guilty pleasure is my husband.

Distress about orgasm is the second most common reason people seek treatment for sexual problems (after desire), occurring in about 5 to 15 percent of women.
 Around 16 percent of women have not had an orgasm, or are unsure whether they’ve had an orgasm, by age twenty-eight, and some women have never had an orgasm in their life and fake it.
Most problems with orgasm are due to too much stimulation to your clitoris— too many worries, too much stress, anxiety, shame, or depression, including stress, anxiety, shame, or depression about orgasm. We talked about this very thing in previous articles.

There are many different touches that can also give you that orgasm
 • Orgasm from clitoral stimulation.

• Orgasm from vaginal stimulation.

• Orgasm just from breast stimulation.

• Orgasm from having her toes sucked.

• Orgasm (well-lubricated) anus stimulation with a finger.

• Orgasm without any genital stimulation, giving your partner oral sex. You are so closely tuned to his arousal that you cum, when he does.
• Orgasm from being massaged or touched with the softness of fingers across your body, your back, down your thighs, inner thighs.
• Orgasms happen in your brain, not your genitals.

• Thirty percent of women are reliably orgasmic from vaginal penetration alone. The remaining 70 percent are sometimes, rarely, or never orgasmic from penetration alone. The most common way for women to orgasm is from clitoral stimulation.

• Orgasm from using sex toys; which there are many types, vibrators, dildos, clitoris toys, anal toys.
About 50% of women have used a vibrator, and these women are more likely to report better arousal, desire and orgasm. These women have either used a vibrator or dildo without their partner and also with their partner for pleasure.

Orgasms are good for your brain and body health.  It has been found through scientific research; Orgasms increase blood flow to that essential organ. Sex makes your brain light up, scientifically speaking. "By delivering more oxygen to the brain, orgasms increase the amount of blood-flow and nutrients reaching your neurons." Experts haven't pinned down how exactly this might translate into real-world benefits (increased critical-thinking skills, stronger memory, etc.), but they're confident that it means good things for your cognitive health.
How sex helps: Your body won't react as strongly to the stress.
The science: People who'd had intercourse frequently in a two-week period experienced a smaller spike in blood pressure compared with people who engaged in other forms of sexual activity or no activity at all.  Biological Psychology. Your body releases oxytocin (the love hormone that's also been shown to reduce stress) during sexual activity, particularly when you orgasm, and because intercourse may feel more intimate than other sexual activities, the researchers speculate that it could produce more oxytocin activity.
Regular sex—even outside of your fertile period—may trigger immune and inflammation changes that prep your body for pregnancy.
So if you are having a lot of regular sex, this can increase your chances of falling pregnant; if you don't want to fall pregnant, then please make sure you take your contraceptive pill at the right times each day, or alternatively you can get a contraceptive implant. Not all women take the implant well and there can be side effects, i was one such women who went through this. Fertility activity 
 Interaction of menstrual cycle phase and sexual activity predicts mucosal and systemic humoral immunity in healthy women.
 In Evolution, Medicine, and Public Health found that sexually active women had lower inflammation levels around peak fertility, which helps with ovulation.
As women we need to know this vital medical information about our own bodies.

Knowing your biology 

Woman have a set of glands at either side of the mouth of the vagina, called Bartholin’s glands, which release fluid during sexual arousal—maybe to reduce the friction of vaginal penetration, maybe to create a scent that communicates health and fertility status. When women “get wet,” this is what’s happening. And it turns out, both women and men “get wet.” The male homologue, the Cowper’s gland, just below the prostate, produces preejaculate.

We talk about women having multiple orgasms, some men can also experience this same thing, even up to five orgasms in a row.

Why do we talk about men “getting hard” and women “getting wet” when from a biological perspective both male and female genitals get both hard and wet. 
Male “hardness” (erection) is a necessary prerequisite for intercourse, and “wetness” is taken to be an indication that a woman is “ready” for intercourse; this is actually wrong. 
Since intercourse is assumed to be the center of the sexual universe, we’ve metaphorized male hardness and female wetness as the Ultimate Indicators of Arousal. But like our anatomies, our physiologies are all made of the same components—changes in blood flow, production of genital secretions, etc.—organized in different ways. 
 We put a spotlight on male hardness and a spotlight on female wetness, but male wetness is happening too, and so is female hardness. Ladies if you feel inside your first layer of your labia at the very top, caress it and you feel it go hard when you become aroused, this is completely natural, and quite often our partners will give this part of our anatomy a name like "pearl" because its about the size of a pearl, precious to our pleasure and their own, watching you enjoy their touch.
Don't forget ladies men if you have a male partner and ladies if you have a woman partner get very aroused and turned on by watching you loose yourself in pleasure, having an orgasm.

Women also have a set of glands at the mouth of the urethra, the orifice we pee out of, called Skene’s glands. These are the homologue of the male prostate. 
The prostate has two jobs: It swells around the urethra so that it’s impossible for a man to urinate while he’s highly sexually aroused, and it produces about half of the seminal fluid in which sperm travels. In other words, it makes ejaculate. 
In women, the Skene’s glands also swell around the urethra, making it difficult to urinate when you’re very aroused. If you’ve ever tried to pee right after having an orgasm, you’ve confronted this directly—you have to take deep, cleansing breaths to give your genitals time to relax.
Women can also experience intense pleasure from anal sex. Anal sex is something you can not rush into, it has to be done responsibly and over time as i mentioned in the last article. I will be doing an article about anal sex in the coming weeks.
Never ever be pressured into anal sex, you have the right to say no to anything that makes you uncomfortable.

In some women, the Skene’s glands produce fluid, which is how some women ejaculate. Female ejaculation—“squirting”—has gotten some attention lately, in part because more science has been done, and in part because it’s been featured in porn.
The biological message is simple: Female ejaculation is a byproduct, like male nipples and the hymen. No matter how big a deal culture makes of it, women vary. 
Some women never ejaculate during orgasm, you still orgasm, you just don't squirt its that simple.

Meet your clitoris
Your best source of knowledge about your own sexuality is to explore your own body, this is male and female.
The clitoris and penis are the external genital organs most densely packed with nerve endings.
Like the penis, the clitoris is composed of three chambers.
The male homologue of the inner labia is the inner foreskin.
Vulvas in soft-core porn are digitally edited to conform to a specific standard. 
I remember in a human sexuality class many years ago, the entire class was told to go home and take a mirror and explore their clitoris and vulva; i realized i had never actually done this, like the rest of the class.
The best way to do this is to touch yourself, explore your clitoris; you can also do this in front of a mirror. Sit or prop yourself up on your bed or lounge and put the mirror in front of you and actually examine your own anatomy. 
I also suggest doing this in a room you feel comfortable in, lock the door if you want, so you wont be disturbed. Make the room relaxing, so you can also relax with yourself. Light a few candles, put on some soft music, make the atmosphere as relaxing as possible.
This is part of you, so ladies get to know your garden of Eden your own flower and the intense pleasure your flower in bloom can give you. 

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you exploring your clitoris, your vulva, use your fingers first , spread your labia looking at it in the mirror, there you will see your inner labia.
Touch it, caress it, then move to the inner layer inside, you as a women need to experience and know your own body. If you can do this and actually learn to masturbate by yourself it can lead to a more forefilling sex life and pleasure with your partner.
You will be able to show him or her exactly where to be touched, guide his or her fingers and even help him or her give you that pleasure and stimulation.
Remember communication is once again the key with your partner.
In a previous article i included a link to a site OMGYES.COM if you click on the link it will take you to the website. 
It is a medical study website not a porn site, it is real women talking about their clitoris, their orgasms, i highly recommend all women to go and see what the site is all about.

 Our sexual responses are triggered firstly by our brain
• Your brain has a sexual “accelerator” that responds to “sexually relevant” stimulation—anything you see, hear, smell, touch, taste, or imagine that your brain has learned to associate with sexual arousal.
• Your brain also has sexual “brakes” that respond to “potential threats”—anything you see, hear, smell, touch, taste, or imagine that your brain interprets as a good reason not to be turned on right now. These can be anything from STDs and unwanted pregnancy to relationship issues or social issues.
• There’s virtually no “innate” sexually relevant stimulus or threat; our accelerators and brakes learn when to respond through experience. And that learning process is different for males and females.
• People vary in how sensitive their brakes and accelerator are. 
This is all something we talked about in a previous article, stress and anxiety and how it can effect your sexual pleasure, your sex life, your ability also to have an orgasm.

We talked in detail in this article some of the things that can stop you from experiencing an orgasm, most of it is in your head as the article talks about. Some of it can be medical, discuss this with your doctor, have a complete check up if you are experiencing pain. You can also seek the counseling of a Psychologist who specializes in sex.
There is absolutely no shame in doing this. If you have a partner take your partner with you, this can also make you feel less stressed about the entire situation and them more sympathetic to your fears and concerns; issues that the both of you can address together.  

We are all sexual beings, men and women and we all go through fears, including during sex. Remember everyone is different.
You are not going to get a sex education and learn about your body from porn or Fifty Shades of Grey. (The most miss-informing, irresponsible books about sex out there.)
So turn off the porn, throw the book in the bin and keep it out of your sex life, you certainly don't need it to enjoy pleasure, and an orgasm. 
Always remember if you are not in a committed relationship please use protection- condoms. 

 When i was a teen and young women, and this would go for millions of woman around the world, then and now, no one tells us about our bodies about sex. You are very lucky if you have a parent who does. But most mothers would not even know the anatomy as i have written here. I didn't when i was growing up, i didn't know any of this until i went into Psychology.
My 17 year old niece a few years ago asked me about her body and sex, with the permission of her mother. Her mother was fine with this and knew i could explain in more detail about the over all picture of her body and human sexuality.
I was learning from my niece that all of the girls she knew and talked to didn't know any of this, and were so confused about their bodies. Boys were pressuring them into having sex, even anal sex at 17 years old because they had seen it in porn. 
I talked to many of the girls and found out that many had been pressured and coerced,  and some had given into that pressure, and had endured the worst sexual experience of their life so far.
This is a subject i would really like to go into more detail with in a new article because it is a growing problem amongst teenage girls.

Until the next article your orgasmic self, you are a Goddess and you deserve pleasure and know about your own body.

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